Monthly Archives: May 2013

I’m an Erotic Mermaid (And I’m Not Alone)

From the amazing "Oracle of Mermaids" by Lucy Cavendish (click on image to buy)

From the amazing “Oracle of Mermaids” by Lucy Cavendish (click on image to buy)

I’m an erotic mermaid.  No, really.  You can go and check out Carolyn Turgeon’s wonderful “I am a Mermaid” blog to find out how and why.  Carolyn, who is the author of the novel Mermaid and the forthcoming The Fairest of Them All, has interviewed me about mermaids and the erotic….and of course the Mermaid Voyage.  And she’s awesome.  Go look, go look!  We’ll also be hosting an interview at the GDP blog with Carolyn soon, so keep an eye out for that, dear readers.

Now.  There is more news.  For example, the Mermaid Voyage: A Two-Week Journey of Erotic Self-Discovery is available for a special discounted rate of $30 for a two-week course. It sets sail on July 1st.  So if you feel like romancing yourself erotically, with audio visulizations and solo lovemaking galore, come join us or shoot me an email with questions.

Also, if you want to write with me, whilst guzzling chocolate and having an inspirational erotic evening, come along to my erotic writing course next week in Boston.  Go Deeper, Baby: Writing Meaningful Erotica is always a delight of an evening.  AND you get a FREE erotic e-book too.  What’s not to adore?

Did you know that you can now buy our bestselling “Femme Fatale: Erotic Tales of Dangerous Women” for just $3.99?

Thanks for supporting Go Deeper Press. If you’d like to browse our erotic, sex-positive e-books for brain and brawn, you can find our website here.

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Erotica, Buffy, and a Few Vulnerable Monsters (Courses for Edgy Writers)

Write fiction inspired by Spike and Buffy

Write fiction inspired by Spike and Buffy

Ever ached to write erotica or fiction inspired by Joss Whedon?  Well, this is the post for you.

Firstly, did you know that yours truly, Lana Fox, teaches writing classes at Grub Street in Boston?  Yes!  And we have a rather wonderful giveaway going on.  If you sign up for Go Deeper, Baby: Writing Meaningful Erotica, a one-night writing seminar that runs on June 6th, you (yes, you!) will receive a free sexy e-book of your choice from Go Deeper Press.  This is a great way to practice erotic writing with the Senior Erotica Editor, and learn how to publish, be an activist author, and earn money in this popular genre.  Check out the course details here.

But wait!  There’s more.  Yours truly also teaches, and writes literary, fantasy and magical realist fiction, under another name.  Which means I’m running a few more amazing one-night writing seminars at Grub Street, including:

Writing about Vulnerable Monsters

When Buffy Gets Spike: Fiction Inspired by Joss Whedon (Scroll down on page)

Forbidden Fairy Tales

More Erotica, Baby

I can’t wait to meet you!

Thanks for supporting Go Deeper Press. If you’d like to browse our erotic, sex-positive e-books for brain and brawn, you can find our website here.

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Freud’s Big Clitoral Snake

Courtesy of the wild Irish comedy "Father Ted."

Courtesy of the wild Irish comedy “Father Ted.”

Sigmund Freud did some important things, including discovering the unconscious mind.  He also pushed those of us who have dreams about snakes into waking up shouting, “Dear god, I need to get laid!”

Well, dear readers, Freud was a bit of a snake himself, wasn’t he?  Especially when it came to the clitoris.  He believed–because he possessed one, snort–that cocks were “more developed” than clits.  He also believed that when a young girl touches her clitoris for pleasure, she is acting as if she has a small penis (when, according to Freud, she really doesn’t).  As soon as she realizes that she doesn’t have a penis, she is embarrassed, said Freud, and starts to masturbate vaginally.

Holy shit.  Pass me a stake, Buffy.

Anyhoo, this was a load of horse manure (apologies to horses), yet it’s the kind of crap that we’ve been hearing since Ancient Greek and Roman times:  “The pussy is less, the penis is more” has too often been our birthright.  *Lana holds head and groans.*

Of course, it so happens that we’ve all been restricted by such babble, men included.  Society’s focus on the penis has caused many to think that size is a marker of sexual performance, which, of course, is a heap of steaming lies.  (When Anais Nin told Henry Miller that she loved his cock because it was smaller than her husband’s and therefore fitted her better, he was profoundly confused.)  As for women, we’ve often been taught that we have something “less” then men.  Indeed, an old professor once told me that, in Elizabethan English slang, a penis was called a “thing” and a woman’s pussy (brace yourself) was therefore called a “no thing.”

Someone please fix me a vodka while I find my boxing gloves.

So!  Today, I challenge you to say something proud about your clit—or clits in general—in public.  Here are a few examples of fabulous things to share

Hard-ons, everyone!  Yes, considering that our clits are about the same size as a small penis, our resulting hard-ons can be pretty darn big.  Sadly, society is often unaware of the fact that women have hard-ons.  So let’s shout it from the rooftops. “I have hard-ons, yes!”

Okay, this one’s a deep one:  As explained by Riki Wilchins in “Genderqueer: Voices from Beyond the Sexual Binary,” we cut up babies on a daily basis because they have both a clit and a penis, or a similar combination.  Says Riki, “Intersexed infants, who are not clearly male or female, occur in about one in every 2000 births.  Because anything that is not male or female is not a true sex, we pronounce them ‘abnormal,’ fit them legally into male or female, and fit them physically into boy or girl by cutting them up at a rate of about five a day.”  Fortunately, there are babies who are not cut up because of this.  In other words, just because someone is born with a penis doesn’t mean that they weren’t also born with a clit, and just because someone is born with a clit doesn’t mean they weren’t also born with a penis.  Oh, and some folks have both.  So suck on that, Freud.

Freud said that dreams about snakes were dreams about the penis…or about all things male.  Yet, he never said that dreams about snakes might be dreams about the clitoris.  I’m saying that though.  Yes, me.  I say, “Dreams about snakes are dreams about the clitoris,” and it seems I have just about as much evidence as good old Mr. Freud.  *Lana beams, proud of self*

There’s a course you can do—a fabulous, spiritual-sexual course—called the Mermaid Voyage: A Two-Week Journey of Erotic Self-Discovery.  In this course, we gain erotic and romantic self-esteem, and we treat the clitoris as a sexual-spiritual gem.  This is a great way of tapping your erotic light in order to help love yourself and also attract the friends and partners you desire.  Find out more, and enjoy a free audio visualization, via Go Deeper Press.

And ya know, when we talk about vaginal and clitoral orgasms, the clitoris is the origin of both.  (Thank you, dear Ms. Clit, for a raging good time.)  In fact, if we were taught about this during sex education classes, we’d know that clitoral stimulation is the key to all kinds of orgasm.  The vaginal orgasm originates in the clit.  The clit is key, baby.  The clit is key.

A brief aside:  In my sex ed. class at the age of 12, one of the few things I learned was how to put a condom onto a banana.

Well, those are a few of the things I like to say about clits, but frankly, I bet you have many of your own to share.  So please do comment below!  I’d love to hear your ideas.  What’s more, today is a celebratory day of clitoral loveliness, and so we’re having a marvelous blog hop!  Please please do visit these wonderfully knowledgeable peeps and read their posts on the gorgeous clitoris.

August McLaughlin: The Highly Sensitive Clitoris

Ande Lyons at Bring Back Desire: Celebrating the Clitoris

Kitt Crescendo: Project Cliteracy

Yolanda Shoshanna: Cheers to the Clit

Angela Tavares Where Were You the First Time You Found the Clitoris?

And you can also join us on Twitter (#ClitChat and #ClitParty).  The most popular tweet today will win a Go Deeper Press erotic e-book of choice, a reading from the amazing sex-positive Clairvoyant, Yolanda Shoshanna, and (yes, there’s more!) a free e-book from the marvelous Bring Back Desire.  All for a tweet!  I don’t know about you, but my clit is doing a little dance in celebration.

Also, if you fancy writing erotica with me in Boston, (yay!), check out Go Deeper, Baby: Writing Meaningful Erotica.

So see you on Twitter!

And in the words of Susie Bright, clits up.

Thanks for supporting Go Deeper Press. If you’d like to browse our erotic, sex-positive e-books for brain and brawn, you can find our website here.

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Where Were You the First Time You Found the Clitoris?

The Clitoris, from "South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut" (1999). Courtesy of southpark.wikia.com.

The Clitoris, from “South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut” (1999). Courtesy of southpark.wikia.com.

Author note: With my apologies to those of us without clits.

Stan: Do you know where I can find the clitoris?
Kyle: The what?
Cartman: What, is that like finding Jesus or something?

My discovery wasn’t anything like South Park’s Stan MarshThere was no journey or quizzical looks,  followed by a great reveal. It could be argued, I guess, that my discovery was a little less innocent.

I had no idea how I knew my dad kept porn in that black knapsack. I honestly don’t remember. Maybe he did a really shit job of covering it up one day, and there I was, young pup passing by, and there was no way I wouldn’t stop to look at the naked tits on the cover.

Long story short, it was a full-length pornographic film of the absolute worst variety: horrible lighting, horrible 80s hair on everyone (and I mean on their heads), absolutely no connection between the actors. But in the first scene, while I watched a beautiful brunette lying legs spread on a faux mattress, with the gray-haired man moving his cock inside her (in sort of a labored way, might I add, and I do remember thinking, “Oh, I can do way better than that if I had one of those”), I noticed that she reached down with her thin fingers, with her red nails, and rubbed in a circular motion at the very top of her labia. She made noises then (finally) like she was having a very, very good time, like everything felt amazingly good. She closed her eyes, tilted her head back, her feathered hair light on her pillow.

This intrigued me. She was a woman and I was a girl and did I have that same spot that she seemed to enjoy touching so much? Oh, I so did.

There are people who argue that kids can learn all the wrong things about sex from porn. So what an amazing time it must be to be inexperienced, when there are legions of erotic presses, sex-positives, sex therapists, and sex educators who can explain all of its delightful intricacies–partnered or not–to everyone who needs it.

Hey! Don’t forget to check out the following blogs celebrating the #ClitParty:

Thanks for supporting Go Deeper Press. If you’d like to browse our erotic, sex-positive e-books for brain and brawn, you can find our website here.

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A Free Erotic Novel for the UK, Yay!

Courtesy of Mischief Books

Courtesy of Mischief Books

Folks, Go Deeper Press are on vacation in Vermont until Friday (yay!) BUT we want to let you know that Lana’s erotic novel, “Confessions of a Kinky Divorcee,” is available FREE to UK folks via Amazon and other bookstores this week!  Yes, visit Amazon.co.uk to download your free copy, or take a look at a chapter first to see if it’s your cup of tea.

What’s the book about?  Through her fur-trimmed diary named Kitten, Debs, a shoe-lover sets off to find out who she really is sexually. The answer involves stilettos, threesomes, and one gorgeous student of the history of the high heel.  The erotic adventure of a lifetime.

Enjoy!

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Go Deeper, Won’t You? Write With Lana Fox

lana headshot3To be honest, I figured it couldn’t hurt: Lana Fox (the Lana fox!) was teaching a class on erotica at Boston’s Grub Street, called “Go Deeper, Baby: Writing Meaningful Erotica.” I already knew I could write sex, but could I write sex erotically? More importantly, since I was soon to be the co-founder and editor of an erotic press, shouldn’t I know all the tricks of the trade?

Enter three hours with Lana and a room full of people who started off a little shy and awkward, but were literally buzzing with anticipation to, if you will, just get it out. Lana does an amazing job at several things: making the space, her classroom, safe for everyone and everything; getting people to open up and shed any shame about writing or talking descriptively about sex; telling the story of the erotica genre and its journey, starting with Anais Nin and Henry Miller, and moving on to more modern brilliant minds, like Shanna Germain and Steve Almond; and breaking down, step by step, exactly how to get hot, connected sex on your page.

What I remember most that night, other than the readings of amazing short erotic scenes that my classmates had written, was the end–the final few minutes–when, thanks to Lana (and ourselves), no one was uncomfortable, and no one held anything back for fear of being called out, and no one had any qualms about saying, “Nice to have met you, good luck with your writing, I hope I get to read it one day.” It’s astounding, I think, how people who are brave and brazen enough to bare all are without a doubt the kindest folks you can study with and learn from.

Lana Fox is teaching “Go Deeper, Baby: Writing Meaningful Erotica” at Grub Street on Thursday, May 30, from 6:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. at Grub Street. Click here for signup information.

Thanks for supporting Go Deeper Press. If you’d like to browse our erotic, sex-positive e-books for brain and brawn, you can find our website here.

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I Chose to Be Gay When I Realized That All I Wanted to Do Was Touch Boobs

Actually, this is totally a lie. I knew I was gay even before I knew that there would be boobs to touch, so “chose” isn’t even close to being the right word. It’s funny and sad (but mostly sad) that people think that we, as members of the LGBTQ  community, actually do choose, like Milky Way versus Snickers–well, Tom likes nuts, so guess which one he’s taking home.

Nah. It’s not like that at all. And it’s great to see the people of Colorado Springs in this YouTube clip, appropriately titled, “When Did you Chose to Be Straight?” (courtesy of Travis Nuckolls and Chris Baker), stumble when the question is turned on them.

Thanks for supporting Go Deeper Press. If you’d like to browse our erotic, sex-positive e-books for brain and brawn, you can find our website here

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Erotic Bishops and Sex-Positive Drag Queens, All in Praise of Love, Baby

Jinkx Monsoon (taken from the amazing JinkxMonsoon.com)

Jinkx Monsoon (taken from the amazing JinkxMonsoon.com)

We’re all about love, at Go Deeper Press. This shouldn’t be any surprise, of course, seeing as we’re an erotic press. What isn’t loving about erotic connection, erotic love and erotic self-love?

In fact, we even have mermaids to prove it.

Now, I told you that to tell you this: See, in our erotic collection As the Bishop Said to the Actress, the Bishop of Hunwich suddenly finds, for the first time in his life, that he is continually horny. And nothing he can do will abate his desires. I hope the following erotic excerpt from my story “Compassion’s Seed” shows what sexual fear and desperation can cause — but fear not!  Our Bishop of Hunwich has some erotic self-love on its way, administered by a most unexpected hand….

This excerpt is explicit and intended for adult readers only.

It was the same throughout the day, during his bishop’s duties. In both his round-table meetings, he grew hard beneath the table as he imagined sliding his cock into the mouths of each clergyman who spoke against gay love with a destructive certainty. The bishop was meant to be against gay marriage, not to mention gay ordination, but in this state of hardness, how could he criticize sexuality at all? Actually, he could fuck a man right now. Yes, he mused. Anyone would do. Sex made you vulnerable. That much was clear. And how did people cope with this constant longing? It made you feel naked, terrified, alone.

Once again, only the coldest cold could quell his desire—a handful of water from the lavatory itself, dispensed with a groan that fell to tears. He buried his face in his hands as his cock grew limp beneath him and sobbed quietly into his fingers. “Oh, Lord,” he whispered, “are you telling me to leave the church? Am I no longer worthy?” But no sooner had he asked this painful question that he found himself hard once again, his sex gleaming with excitement. The more he stared down, the more he saw himself grow, and the hornier he felt. To watch his cock growing beneath his waiting hands was captivating. Once again, he administered cold water. Once again, he questioned his faith.

And of course, you can find out how the bishop overcomes his sexual shame and achieves erotic heights by buying As the Bishop Said to the Actress: The Good Book of Erotic Stories for a mere 99 cents.

We’re also MAJORLY excited that super-talented drag queen Jinkx Monsoon won the crown on RuPaul’s Drag Race this season. Jinkx has shown that she is all about being herself, in spite of what a couple of her rival drag queens might say, and her outfits, which are enticing and original, really speak to that. Well, Jinkx is an activist, too, and is all about fighting for gay marriage across the country. (Yay Delaware, by the way!) Bravo to that!

Extra praise to RuPaul comes from yours truly. When Monica Beverly-Hills broke down on stage, saying that she wasn’t just a drag queen, but also a transgender woman, she touched a whole audience quite deeply. Of course, Ru reassured her, in wonder-Ru style. Well, recently, on the finale of Drag Race, Ru asked Monica what the difference was between being a drag queen and being a transgendered woman. Monica replied that one is who she is, and the other is what she does.  To which Ru added that there are no gender requirements when you apply to go on Drag Race. Ru embraces us all.

And let’s not forget our deep, deep love for both Lady Dragonfly and Go Deeper’s own V.C., both of whom sing the praises of Femme Fatale: Erotic Tales of Dangerous Women.  V.C. also has new novels coming out (big woohoo from us!) and she and I are doing a review swap.  What could be more fun?  And talented Lady Dragonfly (have you read her gorgeous erotica? Delicious!) spreads the word about our erotic Mermaids — how generous, how lovely!

Lastly, seeing as we’re all love-love-love, we’ll finish with a story from Paulo Coelho’s blog. It doesn’t even touch on sex, but it has everything to do with love.  And that suits us beautifully.

Enjoy.

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