Last Saturday night started off with a bang, and how could it not, with me getting ready to enjoy my first Femme Show with, yes, the sexiest femme ever. (I can’t stress this enough, really.) In her thigh-highs and my poorly knotted black tie, off we went to one of the hottest queer events Boston has to offer, where each and every one of the performers were truly stunning in their bravery, their cleverness and their honest-to-goodness ferocity.
The show kicked off with The Bitches of Destiny doing their best “Mein Herr” from Cabaret. All three performers worked their respective black chairs with amazing precision when compared to the original (you can check the clip, if you’re curious), and so that’s what the performance was: a tantalizing, sexy tease done by the troupe, lounging and stretching, with some gentle thrusting done with a sly smile, courtesy of front person Dean James, and just overall fucking sexiness in stockings and tight everything to her right and left. Could it get any better?
Oh, it did—and times a million. Burlesque played a big role at this year’s Femme Show, and so I got to drool and squirm over the amazing performances of GeeGee Louise, the “burlesque impersonator,” who can move his hips and shake his ass in ungodly ways, it’s so beautiful. (Visit GeeGee at his site, and allow yourself to be drawn in by the urge to get his 2013 calendar.) Bikini Thrill, however, did the most evil of teases, dancing, as you may have guessed, to a Bikini Kill track, and the best one at that (“Suck My Left One”). I didn’t know you could do burlesque to good ol’ fashioned riot grrrl punk, but, yes—yes, you can, and so, so well. Bikini Thrill’s number ended with her pulling severed rubber arms and legs out from her overnight bag, and using her stiletto to bring a little more pain to the situation, hacking away at the sad limbs, and then—why not—using the detached hands to fondle her breasts. It was an electric moment, watching this woman disrobe to the voice of Kathleen Hanna, with the same energy and same fuck-you spirit. (You can keep up with all of Bikini Thrill’s wheeling and dealings via Facebook.)
But don’t think for a second that the spoken word performances were not equally as captivating. On that stage, there were some bold, honest, and heartfelt words on the strength and power in identifying as femme, and there’s nothing more powerful or brave, I’d say, than bearing your soul and speaking your truth on who and what you are. Gigi Frost, in the truly sexy “More than Yes,” stood in a strap-on and mini skirt, discussing the power and femininity she felt in fucking her ex, who identified as butch, with her cock. Amy Raina, in “Letter to a Life Is Good Lesbian,” was equally sexy with her smile and humor. If you get the chance to see her perform this piece, do—because you will laugh and laugh hard (and, if you’re like me, you will also do your best to not cry at the end, in your shirt and tie, sitting next to the sexiest femme ever).
And still, this morning, I’m wondering why Idalia is not famous. Is her name not familiar to you? Yes, this is a shame. The self-proclaimed “fierce, Femme, Puerto-minican poet” is a show-stopper, with words and rhymes so fluid, striking and beautiful, and her delivery just as entrancing. She brought a slightly different perspective on femme, mixing in her heritage and experiences as a Latina. Her delivery and her presence—dropping white pages of rhymes to the floor in her long skirt and bare feet—is something I’ll never forget. (Catch Idalia at www.facebook.com/iamidalia.)