Ecstasy and Erotica Are Necessary

photo courtesy of barbaracarrellas.com

I did something this past weekend that may or may not surprise you. True story: It was me, front and center, at Hay House’s “I Can Do It!” conference. Not familiar with Hay House, erotica reader? Well, for those who don’t know, it’s a spirituality/self-help conference. Okay, wait, wait…you’re likely suspicious of how emo and faggy this all sounds. I agree with you, but on the conference title only. Being spiritually attuned and grounded, and learning how to live an authentic life, are actually really important to me. It took me a long time to realize it, but spirituality has played a vital role in my growth as a human, as a woman, as a queer woman. It’s helped me accomplish a lot of amazing things—the launch Go Deeper Press included.

Long story short. I’m at the conference. Around 10:30 a.m., I’m sitting in Barbara Carrellas’ session, Ecstasy Is Necessary. (She has a book, by the way, by the same title, and, according to our own Lana Fox, it’s worth spending your hard-earned money on). Now, here are the reasons for this post: Barbara explained and proved to everyone, in a short two hours, how healing sex can be, how it can change your life. She emphasized the perfect balance between safety and risk. Does this not sound amazing? Safety with your partner (or partners) and trusting them (and yourself) to find a risk that stretches your mind, emotions and body for pleasure and spiritual fulfillment.

Here’s where she nearly made me jump out of my seat, run to the front of the room, and drop to my knees in front of her: She recommended, with enthusiasm—so convincing!—that folks consider reading erotica that they typically wouldn’t. That they take risks, explore something new, to help develop sexual fantasy (this, by the way, plays a huge part in breath and energy orgasms, which is a technique developed by Carrellas, and damn—buy the book or go to her workshops and give it a shot). For women who identified as heterosexual, for instance, she recommended reading gay male erotica (a good suggestion, considering the high success rates). Or why not try some threesome fiction — bi-male/female/bi-male. Good times, right? In fact, try on a little kink while you’re at it. And, really, this one suggestion that Carrellas made got me so excited because GDP’s main focus is on exactly that: offering a rich variety of erotica. We’re hoping that everything we publish will excite you, regardless of how you identify. After all, can we agree that what turns you on might have nothing to do with your sexuality? (Okay, looking your way, heterosexual men, with a lesbian porn collection bigger than mine.)

We’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again now: GDP knows no fear, and there’s a good chance you, our audience, doesn’t either. And of course, we know the importance of erotica in healing and growth.

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